Understanding the Psychological Aspects of a Relationship

Romantic relationships are some of the most meaningful events in people’s lives. However, not everyone understands why they are compelled to get into a relationship, even if it is bad timing for them. Here are a few ways to understand the psychological aspects of a relationship.

Tired of Being Lonely

Unfortunately, many people will enter into bad relationships because they feel lonely and in need of attention, and can only feel satisfied when they are with someone else. The deep root of the problem is this type of person needs to fill an emptiness inside them, and they usually have low self-esteem. They should find a hobby that they enjoy or go volunteer to mend this problem. Loneliness is a normal human emotion that is often triggered by moving or a death in the family, but it is also a serious sign of depression for which some professional help should be sought.

Lack of Love

Many people jump from relationship to relationship looking for “love.” However, this sort of person was most likely abandoned and not given the love and attention they wanted in their childhood years, and this need has leaked into their romantic life. This is also why many people get into relationships for the sole purpose of having children; children give unconditional love. If someone has a past that was difficult and they felt unloved, they will look for an outlet such as their own children, or becoming extremely promiscuous, looking for the love they have wanted all of these years.


Wanting security and feeling safe is a common theme in many relationships. People want to have a relationship for emotional, financial, or sexual security. These people tend to have trust issues and usually had an unstable childhood that has made them develop this security complex. If they need money to pay for their mortgage, they might enter into a relationship with this person offering financial security even though they are ill matched. These people also tend to be survivalists, because it is their instinct to mate with someone who will provide this security. This security complex is a primitive figure in relationships, and is why the human race has evolved over all of these years—you find someone who will protect you in the way that you need.


Many people love to rescue others. This is a large part of why women always seem to go for the “bad boys.” These women think they can actually change the man! These people get into relationships because they are people pleasers, or want to help someone struggling to get their life back in check. However, they tend to care and enable too much to actually help the other become a better person. These people have often been the caregivers of their families and assume responsibility for all of their relationships, whether good or bad.

These are just some of the psychological needs that everyone is trying, sometimes subconsciously, to fill. Once you understand these inherent needs, decision making when it comes to love should improve.

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