Friends With Benefits is a Serious Game to Play

It is difficult for people in today’s busy world to find a suitable dating partner. We all have jobs and families that take up much of our time. Yet, we still have sexual needs and desires that need fulfilling.

One way of solving this modern dilemma was the creation of the “friends with benefits” relationship. Close friends decide that they will become involved sexually. The two are both friends and sex partners; however, they are not necessarily in a romantic, loving partnership. These are relationships of convenience.

Being friends with benefits is not as easy as it may first seem. Here are three important things everyone must do before getting started.

1. Make sure the other partner understands the arrangement.

You do not want them falling in love when you are just out to be friends.

It is always best to be sincere and open about all things in a relationship. When we find that our partner has been deceiving us we are justifiable angered.

Even worse is when we have feelings for another that they do not have for us. We become upset because it hurts to realize the other person does not love of us the same. It can also be quite embarrassing.

When friends decide to engage in sexual relations they should both be clear about how far they plan to allow things to go. By doing so, they can prevent the almost inevitable moment when one of them falls in love from destroying the friendship. Instead, both parties will know whether becoming a permanent couple is a possibility. If either friend cannot deal with the arrangement, they should not become involved sexually.

2. Be open about your other partners.

Oftentimes, one person believes it is cheating to have outside relationships. Clear this problem up from the beginning by deciding if you will be an exclusive couple.

Even when both friends decide not pursue a romance, there is the possibility that one will mistakenly believe they are in a monogamous relationship. Then, when they find that the other friend has been dating on the side things become heated.

It is always a good idea to discuss up front whether to expect exclusivity.

3. Let the other person know you value their friendship above the “benefits.”

Whenever problems arise because of the sexual side of the relationship, the friends should be prepared to stop things. The friendship should always be above the sex. Discussing this fact beforehand can spare hurt feelings later. When someone perceives the development of a situation that could harm the friendship, they should feel free to call a halt to the sex.

In relationships where the partners fail to put the friendship above the benefits, one or both may feel trapped. They may think it impossible to stop engaging in sex because it would cause harm to the friendship.

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