10 Tips for Keeping Your Long-Term Relationship Fresh and Exciting

Falling in love is a euphoric state, and a relationship in “the honeymoon phase” can make you and your partner feel invincible. However, as this freshness starts to fade, relationships can begin to feel stale. Couples in long-term relationships can take steps to be proactive so that these “lulls” never last for long; here are ten ways to keep your connection fresh and exciting through the years:

10. Go Deeper

Early on in a relationship, you tend to ask each other questions related to your early lives, your hopes, dreams, goals and ideal futures. After awhile, these questions are replaced by things like, “Is it time to defrost the chicken?” Make an effort to have deeper conversations regularly about things like current events and your hopes and dreams as a couple.

9. Socialize with Friends and Other Couples

Don’t cut yourself off from the rest of the world; make the effort to maintain your individual friendships and connect socially with other couples from time to time.

8. Try New Things Together

Doing something new together can be just the stimulation your relationship needs; take a trip, do volunteer work, take golf lessons, enroll in a cooking class, or try paragliding — choose something you’ve both always wanted to do.

7. Surprise Each Other

The element of surprise is another key to keeping a relationship fresh and exciting. Bring home an unexpected gift, send a racy text, or take care of a chore or errand your partner normally does. A simple, heartfelt gesture can sweep them off their feet.

6. Greet Each Other with Happiness and Excitement

The way you greet each other after being apart sets the tone for your time together. Find our their “love language” and express your genuine happiness at reconnecting in a way that they will really receive it. For some, a long, meaningful hug and kiss gets the message across; for others, looking deeply into their eyes and asking how their day was makes them feel loved.

5. Shared Goals, Projects and Interests 

Having joint goals and projects is key to a lasting, meaningful connection. It can be raising your children, working on your dream home, better health and fitness, a dream vacation, or other financial goal. Having shared projects promotes a sense of connectedness and can make you feel like a team.

4. Schedule Regular Date Nights

While dates are associated with the beginning phase of a relationship, you should never stop this powerful courtship ritual. Schedule a date night once per week. Dress up and share a nice meal, whether you go out or stay home and cook together.

3. Forgive, and Express Loving Feelings

Never take your partner for granted; say “I love you” often, and never go to bed angry with each other.

2. Stay Connected with that “Original Spark”

While the “mundane” things of life can take some of the romance out of a relationship, never lose touch with that original attraction that brought you together in the first place. Use it as a touchstone to remind yourselves what drew you together, and let it continue to fuel your passion.

1. Gratitude

Appreciation is one of the strongest energies on the planet, and couples who express genuine gratitude for one another on a regular basis are likely to experience many happy years together.

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