10 Signs that the First Date is the Last Date

So you passed gas while getting out of your date’s car the first time you went out. Unfortunate events often happen during the nervousness of the first date. Some events go well beyond unfortunate and end any chance of ever seeing each other again, like these 10 signs that the first date is the last date.

10. Your date arrives an hour late and obviously drunk. He escorts you to his car where three of his drunken friends and the designated driver wait.

9. Your date takes you to a local fast food restaurant and insists you order from the dollar menu. After he orders, he says he left his wallet at home and asks you to pay. While you visit the restroom, he eats your taco, drinks your soda and rummages through your purse.

8. The hot guy you met online is really a 56-year old man with a beer belly and questionable hygiene. He swears he means no harm, he just gets lonely and internet-dating sites help him meet people his own age.

7. Your date’s mother not only comes on the date, but also; cuts your date’s meat and wipes his chin. She sits between him and you during the movie and insists he take you home so they can have coffee before retiring for the night.

6. A friend sets you up on a blind date, which you swore would never happen. You arrive to find your friend has set you up with your ex-boyfriend. Even worse, you cannot stand each other.

5. After a wonderfully expensive meal with equally expensive cocktails, the check comes. Your date says he needs to use the little boy’s room and heads for the restroom. After 20-minutes, you realize he skipped and left you with the bill.

4. During a romantic meal, you find that you and your date have many things in common and even have some of the same mannerisms. While talking about family, he reveals that his father was a sperm donor who he never met but he knows the donor’s id number. You tell him you also come from a sperm donor and dig through your wallet for the donor’s number. When compared, you find you are on a date with your brother.

3. Your date says you need to wear a dress or suit for the first date. You think a fancy meal is in your future and buy an expensive new dress for the special date. Instead, your date takes you to one of his relative’s funeral.

2. You ask out the lovely lady who makes your coffee every morning. The date goes smoothly as you take her to a fancy restaurant then to an exclusive club to dance the night away. She even agrees to a late night cup of coffee at your place. Hoping for the best, you unlock your door, click on the lights and move in for a first kiss. Your beautiful date now has a 5-O’clock shadow and an enormous Adam’s apple.

1. Your date actually starts out great until you spot someone familiar across the dining room. Looking closer, you see your mother kissing a man who is definitely not your father. Shocked and scarred for life, you run from the restaurant leaving your bewildered date behind.

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